Thursday, January 21, 2016

A Ramble About Snow, Blood Sugar, And Washing Dishes

A Ramble …

It's snowing here today. We have a winter weather advisory until midnight. The forecast is for up to four inches. I remember when I was a kid that four inches was nothing. We used to get the big snows back then. They were the kind where all the snow had to be pushed into the middle of Main Street and then hauled off in trucks. Both climate and perception seem to have changed.

All I did today was “think” about a Little Debbie Star Crunch and my blood sugar went up. That really irritates me and sometimes makes me wonder why I even try. I had a very healthy lunch and just fantasized about the treat. Maybe it's the weather causing me a bit of anxiety or I'm confusing hunger with the emotion. It's probably good that I have no Star Crunches in the house or I would have one.

I could be washing a few dishes, but I always tell my husband that after 8 p.m the kitchen is closed and I am going to stick to my word. :)

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Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Cataracts And Crochet

(stock photo)
Today, I've been working on an afghan I started to crochet in 2014. It's going to be about 36 x 36 inches. My intention when I began was to make it as baby blanket that I would save to give as a gift at a later time.

My kink in that plan was an unexpected bout with cataracts in both eyes. It caused me much distress throughout 2015. I lived much of that year in fear. I just didn't find it to be the easy surgery that everyone told me it would be.

I needed to get into the mindset for healing. At one point, I just literally gave up. I gave all of my precious yarn to the local thrift store. I didn't think I would ever touch it again.

Today, when I picked up the old project, if was to prove to myself that I could still see in enough detail that I could crochet. My vision is nowhere like it was before cataracts, but I'm learning that if I stretch my hands out and hold things at a farther distance that I used to that I can see things better than up close. I'm learning to adapt.

The cataracts was very hard for me because this was the year I turned 50. I felt old. I felt defeated. And, to top it off, I was writing a book of faith based prayers and affirmations.

To say the least, I felt conflicted.

I found a way to push through and found my way through to publication. I spent many hours with my nose practically pushed against the computer monitor.

I never thought God would abandon me.

God had me right where he wanted me to be. I was doing my writing from home and was blessed with a husband who is a wonderful caregiver. I had insurance that covered most of the thousands of dollars for both surgeries. My husband is blessed with an income that would cover the rest.

My 2015 was a year of being tested and humbled over and over again.

I am thankful for the growth and for the yarn project I saved in my throwing out frenzy.
I can see much better and I can adapt with my crochet hook. I learned that fear about my eyes could not defeat me with God standing near me.

Here's to a better 2016.

Thanks for reading.